The Story Of Darcy

It's funny how, when I stop and think about it, most of my really big dreams haven't changed. This is the first time I've done that and it's kind of reassuring to know, actually. Maybe new Darcy isn't that different to the Darcy I used to be.

I want Frankie to grow up to be an amazing young woman - the best she possibly can. Of course, I'd love for her to be smart and successful etc but mostly I want her to be healthy and happy.
I would love a second child
A family holiday in Disney
A new car
To own a house (we live in a rented flat)
To work as an archivist or history librarian.

Hopefully, it won't be too hard to get back on track to achieve some of these dreams!

I use the words agender and demisexual to describe myself and I think today most people have an idea what the terms actually mean as a concept but I wanted to try and talk about what they mean to me and how they apply to my life.

In basic terms, and using dictionary definitions here:
agender is a person who does not have a specific gender identity or recognizable gender expression and demisexual is a sexual orientation characterized by only experiencing sexual attraction after making a strong emotional connection with a specific person

We hear more and more about gender-queer people, about non-binary but that's honestly a little... extreme for how I live my life. I also don't have any form of body dysmorphia or desire to transition. I was born female, I have a female body - breasts, vagina, a womb - and I'm perfectly comfortable with both being referred to by and using female pronouns. I just never particularly felt like a woman, I never really associate with the typical feminine traits of my girlfriends. I don't care about 'being a woman', I feel comfortable not wearing a label that says 'female. I prefer to think of myself as a person, rather than my gender.

Agender is a new term that I've recently discovered and started using, but it's not a new expression of myself. I've always felt this way but didn't know there was a term for it. It was Rob who made me aware of it, a couple of years ago; he comes to me with his tablet and he says "Darce, you need to see this, there's a word for people like you" and it... felt like coming home.

I think demisexuality is a lot more clear cut, at least for me. I have to have a strong emotional connection with someone before I experience (sexual)attraction to them. I don't look at people and have that 'oh, they're gorgeous' reaction like so many people do.

I'd known Rob for almost two years, we were very close and I knew that he was attracted to - and sexually interested - in me but I somehow struck very lucky with him. I explained my sexuality to him very early on, we'd shared a few kisses and cuddles and he got it - which is what was part of making me know I'd found the one. I fell in love with him very easily. He would wait for me to initiate the majority of intimate contact and I always remember the day I knew I wanted to have sex with him - and we've had a pretty healthy sex life ever since. I mean, clearly we have sex- we have a daughter! But he's literally the only person on the planet I've ever felt any form of attraction to or wanted to have sex with. Even as a teenager, I never had a crush on a celebrity... but have fallen in love with many fictional characters!